1. Would I rather be a character on LOST or on BATTLESTAR GALACTICA?
Two of my favorite shows. Lost has the island which is like the 8 in a game of Crazy 8's. You never know what you're gonna get with that damn island. Random appearances by dead people and cloud monsters are what you don't want. Healing powers and time-traveling are pretty cool. The people on the island are another thing altogether. You got the crazies (The Others, Locke, Jacob) and the not-as-crazy (Kate, Jack, Sun). The guys are generally hotter than the girls though so that's a negative.
Battlestar Galactica on the other hand, you're in space. On a ship. Not very scenic once you've passed the same star cluster for like the 20th time. The Cylons aren't everyone's worst problem anymore since the planet they thought they'd be living on together is actually made of ruins and ash. You've got more hot girls on BSG though. Grace Park. Tricia Helfer. Since they're Cylons, you could have fun with like 50 of them. Each. So there's that. Game over.
Answer: Battlestar Galactica. (I love you Grace Park.)
2. Who would win in a fight, Cobra Commander w/Destro (cartoon G.I. Joe universe) or Doc Terror w/Hacker (cartoon Centurions universe)?
Cobra Commander is an idiot. Doc Terror is not.
Destro is bad ass. Hacker is not.
(Pretty even so far.)
Cobra Commander, after taking one look at his opponents would scamper in the other direction all the while shouting "I will have my reeeeveeeenge! Cooo-Braaaaa!!!!!" Destro would then shake his metallic head and reveal that he had the Baroness and a whole army of B.A.T.'s waiting for that very moment so they could charge in. Doc Terror though is a frickin' cyborg so he could probably take over te B.A.T.'s and capture the two villainous lovers. Of course, while captured (and not executed because this is a cartoon mind you) Baroness would her feminine charms to hoodwink Hacker into setting them free.
Winner: Draw. Because both sides would proclaim that they had won.
3. Would you rather be one of the Uruk-Hai invading Helm's Deep (LOTR: TT movie) or one of the Persians storming the Hot Gates (300 movie)?
This question can be rephrased into: "Would you rather be killed by scantily clad men or men with long, shiny hair?" There is no right answer to this. You're emasculated either way. But the Spartans were more barbaric with the Persians. There was more chop-chopping and hack-hacking over there in 300. The Elves (who weren't supposed to be there BTW) and the Rohirrim used mostly arrows and horses to do their killing while their swords and knives were strictly stab-once-move-on-to-the-next instruments.
Answer: I'd rather be an Uruk-Hai. Yes, both of them were the favorites to win their respective battles and both of them ultimately lost. But I'd rather Aragorn killed me then Leonidas just because I like my kings dressed for action and not dressed-for-less.
4. The love of your life walks up to you and she can tell you two things: A) She wants to break up with you and get with your best friend or B) She used to be a man.
Tough one here. We're talking about serious love-of-your-life, been with her for 2 years type of thing and not just some chick you met last week. Would you rather that she crush your heart and leave you for your best friend or would you rather find out that she used to have an effin' penis? Both are terrible experiences sure but A) crushes your heart and B) crushes your manhood (and sexual orientation). Think about it like this, what would you rather hear?
"Hey honey...I want to break up. I'm in love with your best friend. I've been seeing him on the side everytime we aren't together. Remember when you brought me home that night I was wasted? I wasn't wasted. I was just pretending so you could bring me home because your best friend was waiting for me in my room."
Or
"Hey honey...remember your best friend? I'm him!"
Answer: A. No way am I sleeping with a she-dude. Try and imagine it for a sec. You slept with a dude.
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