I'm in love with you. I so am.
If only you could read this. If only you could hear me say this to you, face to face.
I didn't want it to be like this, me confessing to a keyboard. These gentle strokes were meant for you and not y-o-u. My eyes are squinting from the glare of the monitor and not from the shine of your smile. You can't hear me choke on my words, can't hear the mistakes my voice makes because my heart and brain can't agree upon what to say to you.
Can't you just figure it out? I stare at you 2.5 seconds longer than I do her. My "smiley" is not pretend, it's doing for me what my real face wishes it could do in front of you. It takes me approximately 3 minutes longer to send you a text message because I'm figuring out how to turn my feelings and thoughts into simple words. When I know that I'm gonna see you, my feet can't outrace my beating heart. When I do see you, time can't keep up with my heart.
Once, you said my name. It was so pedestrian and unexpected. I stood up to leave and you called out to let me know that I had left my pen. In that instant, I didn't just get my pen back, I got something more.
I know you'll never know how I really feel. This song is not new to me, I already know how it goes, how it ends. This isn't a tale of two lovers. This is just the story of me and you. Just like the others before you, you'll find out how I feel, but not how I love. I think it gets lost in the noise. It's okay, though. Perfect love stays perfect in a dream because well, it's just a dream. My dream. Unassailable and unattainable. There's no one else in it but you and I. Soon after, I'll file it away, and you'll be just another girl that I fell in love with who didn't catch me. It doesn't mean I stopped loving you. It just means that it wasn't meant to be. Again.
Unlike many love stories out there, mine takes longer to tell. Maybe, there'll be a plot twist before it ends and it's actually you I'll end up with. Maybe you'll realize tomorrow that I'm the one and then I can let you read this. For now, we'll let the night run its course. I'll fall asleep, you will too. You'll dream. And I'll dream. Of y-o-u.
If only you could read this. If only you could hear me say this to you, face to face.
I didn't want it to be like this, me confessing to a keyboard. These gentle strokes were meant for you and not y-o-u. My eyes are squinting from the glare of the monitor and not from the shine of your smile. You can't hear me choke on my words, can't hear the mistakes my voice makes because my heart and brain can't agree upon what to say to you.
Can't you just figure it out? I stare at you 2.5 seconds longer than I do her. My "smiley" is not pretend, it's doing for me what my real face wishes it could do in front of you. It takes me approximately 3 minutes longer to send you a text message because I'm figuring out how to turn my feelings and thoughts into simple words. When I know that I'm gonna see you, my feet can't outrace my beating heart. When I do see you, time can't keep up with my heart.
Once, you said my name. It was so pedestrian and unexpected. I stood up to leave and you called out to let me know that I had left my pen. In that instant, I didn't just get my pen back, I got something more.
I know you'll never know how I really feel. This song is not new to me, I already know how it goes, how it ends. This isn't a tale of two lovers. This is just the story of me and you. Just like the others before you, you'll find out how I feel, but not how I love. I think it gets lost in the noise. It's okay, though. Perfect love stays perfect in a dream because well, it's just a dream. My dream. Unassailable and unattainable. There's no one else in it but you and I. Soon after, I'll file it away, and you'll be just another girl that I fell in love with who didn't catch me. It doesn't mean I stopped loving you. It just means that it wasn't meant to be. Again.
Unlike many love stories out there, mine takes longer to tell. Maybe, there'll be a plot twist before it ends and it's actually you I'll end up with. Maybe you'll realize tomorrow that I'm the one and then I can let you read this. For now, we'll let the night run its course. I'll fall asleep, you will too. You'll dream. And I'll dream. Of y-o-u.
1 comment:
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