Dear United Nations Ambassadors,
Let me begin by saying that I hope all of you are all doing well and that you and your respective countries have not been squashed by a walking mountain. I haven't (obviously) but it was close! I live in Manila and am a survivor of last year's kaiju incursion. Man, was that terrifying! Seeing those things on TV is one thing, but in real life? You can't even begin to comprehend it. My family and I were lucky that we got to a shelter in time. Some of our neighbors didn't and were killed in the attack. We couldn't even find some of them, after. Right now, we're staying at a shelter (it's really a community basketball court) and living off these wonderful food rations you've been giving out. They taste like real oatmeal, yum! But I digress.
I write to you today about the "Wall of Life" defense project being constructed along our coastline. I just want to say that I think it's not going to work. I'm sure you guys know what you're doing and have your experts and all, but it seems to me that it's not going to be all that effective. I kinda get the sense that it won't be of much use against the kaiju. For one thing, the wall doesn't seem to have any weapons, no turrets or missile launchers of any kind. Is it electrified? I hope it is. I think any offensive capabilities would come in handy, you know, so that the wall is not just there to defend, but to repel kaiju attacks. Secondly, what happens if the kaiju, God-forbid, break through? I know you're building sturdy walls but if the attacks ramp up, well I hope that kaiju get tired because not much seems to slow them down. And that brings me to my last point: why are you getting rid of the Jaegers? We kinda liked them, you know. I mean, who doesn't love giant fighting super robots? We were raised on a bunch of them in our youth, and now that they actually exist, why do you have to take them away? Obviously, they appealed to us on an inner-kid level, but then you made them kaiju-killing machines and that pretty much endeared them to us on a basic-human-desire-to-live level. Why scrap that program then? Going back to my second point, if the wall falls, wouldn't having a Jaeger ready be a smart idea? I know recently they've been getting beat up badly, but if I were running things, I wouldn't resort to building a wall. I'd just build bigger and badder Jaegers, he he. But hey, I'm just a regular Juan, so I'm sure I wouldn't know any better than the best each country has to offer!
Okay, I just wanted to get that off my chest. I'm sure the wall is going to work since none of the kaiju we've seen so far can burrow underneath the ground or jump really high or you know, fly. The "Wall of Life" is surely going to protect us, as long as we can finish building it (it's huge!). Here's hoping we only ever see one kaiju at a time.
Yours Truly,
Justin Favis
P.S.
Please tell Marshal Pentecost that he rocks! And go Gipsy Danger!
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