Other people get what I want. Not in a general sense. This is very specific.
It's more people than things really. Other people end up with the people I want.
No, it's not wrong to use the word "want" when talking about other people. You really are allowed to 'want' other people. I do. I do very often. And I never get them. Someone else will get them. Ironically, most of these "someone else's" are people I know. My friends. Yes, I am going to admit right her.
My friends end up with the people I like. That's the truth of it all. And it's goddamn depressing.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
I Really Should
I really shouldn't be best friends with you anymore when we clearly aren't.
I really shouldn't like you anymore since it's a complete waste of time.
And I really should stop talking to you and texting you and thinking about you and BEING IN LOVE WITH YOU since well, it's stupid.
Damn it.
I really should stop fucking up my life.
I really shouldn't like you anymore since it's a complete waste of time.
And I really should stop talking to you and texting you and thinking about you and BEING IN LOVE WITH YOU since well, it's stupid.
Damn it.
I really should stop fucking up my life.
Friday, December 18, 2009
My Fault
Everything's my fault it seems.
All the broken relationships I have are my fault. Good job.
I am an idiot.
All the broken relationships I have are my fault. Good job.
I am an idiot.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
Real Pabaon
Today supposedly, the seniors of the AdMU would be having some senior-type stuff instead of regular classes. "Pabaon" they called it. Not. Hahaha.
-Woke up. Tried calling Poca. No answer. Twice I called and he didn't answer. I found out later that he could've answered, he just didn't. Thanks Pat.
-As I was driving to school, Ian texted me about "Pabaon." According to him, I'd need a book to stay awake. Uh-oh.
-Got to school. Looks like Ian was right and "Pabaon" was hella boring and therefore it became, in my eyes, optional.
-Camille and Wissa arrive. Wissa automatically makes me happy by motioning the universal Left 4 Dead sign. I am so ready for some L4D.
-We debate on whether or not we are to go inside. This takes a while.
-Andrea shows up. We eventually decide to go inside but stay by the doors.
-We leave like 3 minutes later. Andrea follows suit as she can't understand Filipino :))
-The decision is made. CHILI WILLY'S!
-I see Poca in the parking lot hurrying towards Leong Hall. We stop him at the crosswalk and kidnap him, forcing him to come with us. He obliges rather quickly.
-My car's our transport. Heading to Katipunan and CHILI WILLY'S!
-Camille and I concoct a plan. Wissa renders it useless :))
-Wissa loves Tik Tok too. Good job Dub :))
-CHILI WILLY'S is open! But there is no parking available. So damn it.
-Wissa has a better idea: NEW BANAPPLE!
-NEW BANAPPLE's parking challenges me. The guard wants to see if I can put it over the sidewalk. Easy as banapple pie.
-However, the (non-)hassle could've been avoided altogether had Geeann not beat us there and taken the less obstacle-y parking slot.
-We go inside. This is my first time in a BANAPPLE, much less NEW BANAPPLE. I have to ask Camille how to order. :))
-Patrick is stumped. What do I order? Something with rice? What??
-Andrea has a discount card, announces this fact to me and doesn't offer to let me avail of it too. THANKS Moo. (Kidding! :p)
-Geeann got thinner or (taller.) Geeann: "Ganon talaga 'pag tumatanda ang babae." Patrick got creepier. Patrick: "Parang pumayat ka nga. Chine-check out kita."
-The strawberry cheesecake thing looked good. I will get some next time.
-Orders are made and we sit around our cramped little table. We were not in an episode of How I Met Your Mother and we weren't in McLaren's.
-Small talk. The table provides our topic. Was it a banapple in the sea, really? Wissa: "M&M's? M&M's."
-We move to another table. Less cramped. But the design is reminiscent of marbles so Patrick is happy. Patrick: "Jolen?"
-In a stroke of genius (or insanity) Wissa wants to go back and sign on the sign-out sheet. Andrea shockingly agrees. She, Dub and I head back to Ateneo.
-Wissa drives. I'm alive and typing this. That's all you have to know about her driving. And that she has road rage when there's no music.
-"Wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy," God I love that song.
-Shortcut! Wissa is an experienced driver.
-Andrea makes kuwento.
-A ride with Andrea, Wissa and me is not awkward. Not awkward at all.
-Hehe @ the line directly above.
-Suffice to say, we accomplish what we set out to do. I will not delve into the details for it involved morally questionable acts.
-(Will someone from OSCI read this?)
-Back to NEW BANAPPLE. Wissa doesn't kill us naman. The parking nearly killed me though.
-The three of us finally get to eat. My longganisa was okay. Geeann's order was great too.
-Andrea was the only girl who finished all of her food. Go Andrea!
-Wissa needs to use the bathroom. I accompany her in the waiting area. The person who walks out of the ladies room makes Wissa and I do a double-take. Strange.
-Camille finishes my water. Boo.
-Apparently, for some people, L4D > The Sacrament of the Holy Eucharist
-Geeann, Wissa and Andrea in one car. Camille, Poca and I in the other.
-Camille, why were you in front? Kala ko ba kapag may guy, yung guy sa harap? :))
-Though our attempt to catch the mass was met with failure since we got there when it ended. Nice.
-Separate ways. Bye guys.
We all thought Pabaon was going to be this really important lecture on graduating. Turned out it wasn't. Turned out Pabaon was really about taking the things College gives you out into the real world and cherishing it for the rest of your days. You know, things like friendship. After 4 years, but what really felt like no time at all, I was at a restaurant with the friends I began college with having fun and just enjoying the each other's company. What are the odds? :)
-Woke up. Tried calling Poca. No answer. Twice I called and he didn't answer. I found out later that he could've answered, he just didn't. Thanks Pat.
-As I was driving to school, Ian texted me about "Pabaon." According to him, I'd need a book to stay awake. Uh-oh.
-Got to school. Looks like Ian was right and "Pabaon" was hella boring and therefore it became, in my eyes, optional.
-Camille and Wissa arrive. Wissa automatically makes me happy by motioning the universal Left 4 Dead sign. I am so ready for some L4D.
-We debate on whether or not we are to go inside. This takes a while.
-Andrea shows up. We eventually decide to go inside but stay by the doors.
-We leave like 3 minutes later. Andrea follows suit as she can't understand Filipino :))
-The decision is made. CHILI WILLY'S!
-I see Poca in the parking lot hurrying towards Leong Hall. We stop him at the crosswalk and kidnap him, forcing him to come with us. He obliges rather quickly.
-My car's our transport. Heading to Katipunan and CHILI WILLY'S!
-Camille and I concoct a plan. Wissa renders it useless :))
-Wissa loves Tik Tok too. Good job Dub :))
-CHILI WILLY'S is open! But there is no parking available. So damn it.
-Wissa has a better idea: NEW BANAPPLE!
-NEW BANAPPLE's parking challenges me. The guard wants to see if I can put it over the sidewalk. Easy as banapple pie.
-However, the (non-)hassle could've been avoided altogether had Geeann not beat us there and taken the less obstacle-y parking slot.
-We go inside. This is my first time in a BANAPPLE, much less NEW BANAPPLE. I have to ask Camille how to order. :))
-Patrick is stumped. What do I order? Something with rice? What??
-Andrea has a discount card, announces this fact to me and doesn't offer to let me avail of it too. THANKS Moo. (Kidding! :p)
-Geeann got thinner or (taller.) Geeann: "Ganon talaga 'pag tumatanda ang babae." Patrick got creepier. Patrick: "Parang pumayat ka nga. Chine-check out kita."
-The strawberry cheesecake thing looked good. I will get some next time.
-Orders are made and we sit around our cramped little table. We were not in an episode of How I Met Your Mother and we weren't in McLaren's.
-Small talk. The table provides our topic. Was it a banapple in the sea, really? Wissa: "M&M's? M&M's."
-We move to another table. Less cramped. But the design is reminiscent of marbles so Patrick is happy. Patrick: "Jolen?"
-In a stroke of genius (or insanity) Wissa wants to go back and sign on the sign-out sheet. Andrea shockingly agrees. She, Dub and I head back to Ateneo.
-Wissa drives. I'm alive and typing this. That's all you have to know about her driving. And that she has road rage when there's no music.
-"Wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy," God I love that song.
-Shortcut! Wissa is an experienced driver.
-Andrea makes kuwento.
-A ride with Andrea, Wissa and me is not awkward. Not awkward at all.
-Hehe @ the line directly above.
-Suffice to say, we accomplish what we set out to do. I will not delve into the details for it involved morally questionable acts.
-(Will someone from OSCI read this?)
-Back to NEW BANAPPLE. Wissa doesn't kill us naman. The parking nearly killed me though.
-The three of us finally get to eat. My longganisa was okay. Geeann's order was great too.
-Andrea was the only girl who finished all of her food. Go Andrea!
-Wissa needs to use the bathroom. I accompany her in the waiting area. The person who walks out of the ladies room makes Wissa and I do a double-take. Strange.
-Camille finishes my water. Boo.
-Apparently, for some people, L4D > The Sacrament of the Holy Eucharist
-Geeann, Wissa and Andrea in one car. Camille, Poca and I in the other.
-Camille, why were you in front? Kala ko ba kapag may guy, yung guy sa harap? :))
-Though our attempt to catch the mass was met with failure since we got there when it ended. Nice.
-Separate ways. Bye guys.
We all thought Pabaon was going to be this really important lecture on graduating. Turned out it wasn't. Turned out Pabaon was really about taking the things College gives you out into the real world and cherishing it for the rest of your days. You know, things like friendship. After 4 years, but what really felt like no time at all, I was at a restaurant with the friends I began college with having fun and just enjoying the each other's company. What are the odds? :)
Fantasy!
So after a 14-4 start to the season, I have come back down to earth. My record for the past 4 weeks is 18-18. Not bad, not good, just really mediocre.
I'm lucky I think. My record could've been worse. Timely injuries of course, were the main factor in all of this. My team has been hurt for the past month. Hurt players do not have stats and therefore do not contribute. Erick Dampier has been hurt. Andrei Kirilenko. Troy Murphy was hurt at the start of the year, came back and has not been producing as much as I think he can. I signed Mike Dunleavy Jr. and Kevin Martin when they were still injured but Mike's come back and is giving me some decent numbers. Injuries are part of the game. I understand. I will not complain. I will hope though. Because in a good week? My team will kill your team.
What is a good week first and foremost? Well it's a week where none of my guys are hurt. Production matters. And if all my guys are producing, my team will kill your team. I know, you can say that about all fantasy teams. But does your team have 5 guys who can potentially go for triple-doubles? Andre Iguodala, Russell Westbrook, Deron Williams, Monta Ellis and Tyreke Evans are all capable of that. They're a group of ultra-athletic, quick and strong types who can fill-up many different categories. Guys can get me steals and 3's too. Jeff Green and Murphy are versatile bigs who can play inside or out, grab boards and shoot a high percentage on free throws. Dampier can get me 16 rebounds and 3 blocks easy. Aaron Brooks is small but deadly from the outside. Once he gets going, Mike Dun will be a steady diet of 16-5-5 with 2 threes and good percentages. My one guy who has been in a funk all season long? Wilson Chandler. Once he snaps out of it, get ready for some outrageous totals across the board. I'm still waiting for Kevin Martin for crying out loud! Oh and I just picked up Udonis Haslem (had to drop AK) so he's going to give me a boost in boards big time. Really, my team will kill your team.
I think this'll be a good week. After two straight weeks of 4-5 losses, this is the week that will put me back on the top of the standings. No Kevin Martin yet but that won't be a problem. I got this. I may be against Dwyane Wade, Derrick Rose, Tim Duncan and Josh Smith this week but hot damn I feel confident. Here goes nothing.
I'm lucky I think. My record could've been worse. Timely injuries of course, were the main factor in all of this. My team has been hurt for the past month. Hurt players do not have stats and therefore do not contribute. Erick Dampier has been hurt. Andrei Kirilenko. Troy Murphy was hurt at the start of the year, came back and has not been producing as much as I think he can. I signed Mike Dunleavy Jr. and Kevin Martin when they were still injured but Mike's come back and is giving me some decent numbers. Injuries are part of the game. I understand. I will not complain. I will hope though. Because in a good week? My team will kill your team.
What is a good week first and foremost? Well it's a week where none of my guys are hurt. Production matters. And if all my guys are producing, my team will kill your team. I know, you can say that about all fantasy teams. But does your team have 5 guys who can potentially go for triple-doubles? Andre Iguodala, Russell Westbrook, Deron Williams, Monta Ellis and Tyreke Evans are all capable of that. They're a group of ultra-athletic, quick and strong types who can fill-up many different categories. Guys can get me steals and 3's too. Jeff Green and Murphy are versatile bigs who can play inside or out, grab boards and shoot a high percentage on free throws. Dampier can get me 16 rebounds and 3 blocks easy. Aaron Brooks is small but deadly from the outside. Once he gets going, Mike Dun will be a steady diet of 16-5-5 with 2 threes and good percentages. My one guy who has been in a funk all season long? Wilson Chandler. Once he snaps out of it, get ready for some outrageous totals across the board. I'm still waiting for Kevin Martin for crying out loud! Oh and I just picked up Udonis Haslem (had to drop AK) so he's going to give me a boost in boards big time. Really, my team will kill your team.
I think this'll be a good week. After two straight weeks of 4-5 losses, this is the week that will put me back on the top of the standings. No Kevin Martin yet but that won't be a problem. I got this. I may be against Dwyane Wade, Derrick Rose, Tim Duncan and Josh Smith this week but hot damn I feel confident. Here goes nothing.
Friday, December 4, 2009
You have got to know right? You know. You have to. Otherwise, you wouldn't be doing this to me. Because you're really doing this. You can't really have crushes on almost everyone I know. You're in love with everyone around me. Do you realize what it is you're doing to me?
You have to know. Oh dear god.
You have to know. Oh dear god.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Finished
Oh god. I just lost the fight. I just lost. It's over.
This was the end. This was it. Tonight, I lost the battle for your heart.
:(
This was the end. This was it. Tonight, I lost the battle for your heart.
:(
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